pep talk

look, it’s great, it’s gonna be fun,
i haven’t stopped talking to you,
haven’t stopped thinking about you,
and i’m trying not to be scared,
to not be afraid of something real,
i want to push the other stuff aside,
and just say, “fuck it, i’m young,
let’s have some really good sex,
i’m older now, i can handle this”;
but damn, baby, i don’t think
you understand, i don’t feel this
electric, living wire, goosebumps extraordinaire –
don’t ever think you’re not already
too special to me. just loved
that you whistled so much the
around me the next day, and then later,
i was humming, something like happiness,
it’s seeming pretty close and similar,
something incredible, incomplete and
unknown, and i just wanna know you
so bad, just want to hold you as much
as i want to do the rest, but i think you
hit my heart with a hammer and woke it up
somehow, i think you’ve already told me
some things i didn’t want to hear. but
i thought you weren’t sleeping alone
and i remember liking to be wrong,
you’ve got your young blood in the schedule,
the misunderstood, overheard ‘i love you’,
and i really wanna stick around anyways,
it’s not scaring me off, but plenty still could,
i think this is how love can be dangerous,
i know it’s either the best or worst
timing, we built it up to burst,
ok, so it was me, okay, so
you want to know me too,
baby, i thought you were already
looking into my soul, that’s
how it crushes me, that’s
how it elevates me too,
you’re always making me feel
better when i’m seeing you,
i can’t trust these short-scripted,
overthought messages and read
more than what’s there, god help a
fucking writer for forgetting
the rest of the world might hate poetry,
so i’m gonna trust some of the
rest of it, let the words go, let it
go silent, and just give you some loving
if i can, if you’ll let me, baby.

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